Hey Dude

from $20.00
Soft enough to spit filth in, sturdy enough to survive the fallout.

Yo—
Hey dude, could you send nudes of your two boobs?
I just ate a blue chew, I’m in a huge mood,
And I’m using lube to pew pew into my new fleshlight—
It’s the size of a doob tube.

...You’re gonna want a shirt that can keep up with that kind of energy.

This ain’t just cotton. It’s battle-tested, bar-blessed, filth-ready fabric.
The double stitching is there for when your punchlines hit harder than your childhood trauma.
It’s quarter-turned, just like you should’ve been the second you heard that rhyme.

Material Breakdown (for nerds and Lil Q fans):
• 100% ring-spun cotton—soft enough to wear in the booth, bold enough to disrespect your ex
• Sport Grey: 90% cotton, 10% polyester—because sometimes you sweat through your setup
• Dark Heather: 65/35 poly blend—for when you’re both horny and haunted
• 4.5 oz/yd²—that’s grams per square meter of Doug Tree-certified degeneracy
• Sourced from real places, unlike Lil Q’s imaginary fanbase

Disclaimer:
White color may show up off-white.
Which is fitting—because nothing about that “Hey Dude” bar was clean.

This product is made especially for you as soon as you place an order, which is why it takes us a bit longer to deliver it to you. Making products on demand instead of in bulk helps reduce overproduction, so thank you for making thoughtful purchasing decisions!
Size:
Soft enough to spit filth in, sturdy enough to survive the fallout.

Yo—
Hey dude, could you send nudes of your two boobs?
I just ate a blue chew, I’m in a huge mood,
And I’m using lube to pew pew into my new fleshlight—
It’s the size of a doob tube.

...You’re gonna want a shirt that can keep up with that kind of energy.

This ain’t just cotton. It’s battle-tested, bar-blessed, filth-ready fabric.
The double stitching is there for when your punchlines hit harder than your childhood trauma.
It’s quarter-turned, just like you should’ve been the second you heard that rhyme.

Material Breakdown (for nerds and Lil Q fans):
• 100% ring-spun cotton—soft enough to wear in the booth, bold enough to disrespect your ex
• Sport Grey: 90% cotton, 10% polyester—because sometimes you sweat through your setup
• Dark Heather: 65/35 poly blend—for when you’re both horny and haunted
• 4.5 oz/yd²—that’s grams per square meter of Doug Tree-certified degeneracy
• Sourced from real places, unlike Lil Q’s imaginary fanbase

Disclaimer:
White color may show up off-white.
Which is fitting—because nothing about that “Hey Dude” bar was clean.

This product is made especially for you as soon as you place an order, which is why it takes us a bit longer to deliver it to you. Making products on demand instead of in bulk helps reduce overproduction, so thank you for making thoughtful purchasing decisions!